My
LPR
Story
It's time to get real.
How did I discover LPR?
Before studying voice, I was a Communications major, with merely 1-2 years of classical voice training. I was 22.
When I received THE call, I was stoked and started to transfer to this new college.
I got to work with one of the world-renowned classical sopranos in the world – how did I get so lucky?
After one year, both my voice teacher and I realized that I had not made any progress at all. Well, to be exact, I would make gains during voice lessons; yet in the practice room, I was going back to ground zero. At the end of my second year, I did not make it into the Performance program with that progress.
I was disappointed. I was exhausted. I was angry.
I fell into anxiety and depression because of the never-ending cycle with no progress in the techniques. There was a point that I lost my love for singing. I stopped going to the practice room. I stopped putting effort into auditions. I just stopped caring. I witnessed exhaustion and helplessness from my voice teacher. I didn’t blame her – who wouldn’t be after seeing no progress in the student for two years?
My turning point appeared in 2015.
There was a vocal health screening at my undergraduate college. To my surprise, I was referred to an ENT and got my larynx checked out via stroboscopy. After several meetings with ENTs and speech therapists, I finally received an answer:
I have LPR.
Now, to most, that might just be a diagnosis. However, a tremendous sense of relief came over me: I knew it had something to do with my body, not because I was lazy.
Having the right person to work with is crucial.
After receiving my Bachelor’s degree, I went against everyone’s advice and went straight into a graduate program in Voice Performance. I told myself, “This is my time to shine, finally.”
During the summer before graduate school, my symptoms came back with a vengeance: a sour taste in my mouth and a sore throat in the morning, and having a “man voice” when I wake up. My practice sessions were cut short to less than 30 minutes because of fatigue and increased soreness. The initial medical management plan no longer worked for me. I reached out to a faculty member in the Speech and Hearing Department in Hong Kong. During the summer, I worked with the faculty through voice therapy and relearned how to use my speaking voice.
At the end of the summer, I was very thankful to have a referral at a speech and hearing clinic at the graduate program I attended. After my initial screening with the clinic, I was referred to an ENT (Ear, Nose, and Throat) doctor and eventually a speech-language pathologist (SLP). Medical clearance was required to start my speech therapy to ensure that my vocal folds show no abnormalities. Upon inspection, my vocal folds were healthy; however, some inflammation in cobblestone-like texture appeared at the back of my throat. I was prescribed omeprazole (a proton-pump inhibitor, or PPI) and a nasal spray with mometasone (a form of corticosteroid).
Once I received the clearance, I returned to the Speech and Hearing Clinic at my graduate institution. I was very fortunate to work with a student clinician who is also a classically-trained singer.
During therapy, I learned a lot. The cherry on top – I got to sing in front of the clinician and the supervisor! The combination of medication and voice therapy gave me the confidence I needed back. In the voice lessons, I witnessed more growth in my techniques too.
Recovery from LPR is not a linear process, y'all.
I had my voice therapy during my second semester in the graduate program and was discharged at the end of the semester. I was very excited to see more progress in voice lessons; I even got a role in an opera production (it’s a small one – but hey!)!
I thought that I was finally out of this misery, yet I was wrong.
If you are or have been in a graduate music program in performance, you are required to perform during your final semester. I had all my songs lined up for the recital during my penultimate semester. I felt confident with the technique. I thought I was ready to go.
After returning for my final semester, I noticed that some of the LPR symptoms returned; on top of that, my voice became tired and hoarse more quickly.
One observation I have was that my LPR symptoms are exacerbated by stress – that it came to a point where no medication could help. Before I started the final semester, I went through some stressful moments. The return of symptoms was not a surprise to me, but how much progress was being taken away. A week before my recital, I could not sing a single note without hurting my voice, not to mention on the day of my graduate recital.
It felt like undergraduate over again: sad, angry, fatigue.
I never felt so ashamed of myself because of my voice.
I started to doubt myself again.
Sometimes, it can be a blessing in disguise.
During the graduate program, I was eager to about my instrument – my larynx. I think it had to do with my experience during voice therapy. At the same time, I decided to add a specialization into my study: Voice Science and Pedagogy. Essentially, I got to study the mechanism of voice production, teach voice lessons, and conduct my own research project!
With these beautiful experiences down the belt, I decided to get my second master’s degree.
I initially started with Communication Sciences and Disorders (CDIS), which unfortunately did not pan out the way I hoped. But, that’s okay – I ended up with bigger and better things.
I have a publication in the Journal of Voice.
I got to share meet the wonderful, like-minded people around the world in professional organizations such as The Voice Foundation and Pan American Vocology Association (PAVA).
I met TJ – my best friend, my lab partner, and now my husband.
Last but not least, I am joining a professional opera chorus for the FIRST TIME in my life.